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Operation Gelding

Posted by Jolly on December 26, 2012

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Got words through the rumor mill that these MAN CONTOLLERS will be issued to females in all Air Force Fighter Squadrons as part of OPERATION GELDING.  By controlling our feelings, attitudes, and testosterone levels the Air Force feels it can eradicate sexual harassment from it's ranks and avoid the removal of testicles from fighter pilots. The HOTAS will be a bit involved, but the DASH-1 has some specific recommendations to prevent certain forms of sexual harassment:

  • Prevent Fighter Pilot Singing - Double pump Ego followed by Mute
  • Prevent No Slug Calls - Obvious choice here
  • Prevent fighter pilot lies (i.e. "I Love you no shit, checks in the mail, etc") - Raise Orgasm Elevation Wheel three clicks and Castle Down on Truth button.
  • Turn us into SNAPs - Press Feelings Button followed by Shopping or Shoes within 6.9 seconds.

I was hoping this was just a bad dream, but my wife found one under the Christmas tree.  For the love of God, make it stop.  The Morale Suppression Team (MST) is even coming after retired old codger fighter pilots like me.  FYI, the definition of MST in Fighter Pilot Uncyclopedia -- A group of individuals who can manage to take the joy out of just about everything, See buzz kill.  

This device works my friends. Here are some of the things that were on my Christmas wish list, and after complaining to my wife about not getting any of them she double pumped EGO followed by Mute/Listen/Toilet and I ended up doing something I've never done before.  Boys, life as we knew it is over!

My Wish List Before Man Controller:

24-gun-grill.jpg        20-rocket-recliner.jpg

23-toilet-chair.jpg         shaving-beaver.jpg

After Ego double pump, followed by Mute/Listen/Toilet:

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Don't forget to visit the FU Gucci Store

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Report the FU Store ASAP and check our our embroidered shirts and hats!  

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FU GUCCI STORE - Customize Your FU Gear

If you have a specific design combination you want, just e-mail us at Jolly@fighterpilotuniversity.com and we will get it loaded up for you.  Additionally, there will always be discounts if you have a large order.  Before placing your order, call our vendor at 1-888-8ZAZZLE (892-9953) or (408) 983-2800 to see if there are any discounts available.



Comments:

Posted by butch71 on
I like it.
Posted by Bear on
Ouch. Better watch my six
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