Fighter Pilot University - WTFO / The Blog

What Makes A Fighter Pilot?

Fri, 03 Sep 2010 06:51:00-0500

I stumbled on this video made many years ago, but I think the words of Robin Olds are the best I've herd describing what it means to be a fighter pilot. For those who have been, are, and will be----listen and learn from the master my friends.

Communism verses Freedom?

Fri, 27 Aug 2010 10:04:00-0500

Hey, the cold war is over and communism is dead right? I might buy the first part of that statement, but as far as I can see communism is alive and well right here in the good old USA. If we run a comparison of communism verses freedom, I think most intelligent folks out there would choose freedom. Our left leaning media and friends in the East like to compare communism to capitalism, which I think capitalism wins hands down too. But I feel that comparison puts the focus on our economies verses our way of life. I mean if you’ve been to China lately you might think that communism is not such a bad thing, but we tend to forget that 50 million Chinese were murdered under the tyranny imposed by a hostile communist take over.

When I posted that Flanker video made by someone from the Mother Russia, it was humorous that it’s producer pointed out that the Flanker would end the spread of American Tyranny throughout the globe. We can argue about our foreign policy for sure and perhaps a need to move toward less intervention overseas, but to call it American tyranny is beyond hypocritical when compared to our compassionate communists friends. However, I think most Americans are a bit tired of trying to solve the world’s problems and force our way of life on cultures that will never understand the concept of freedom.

We have enough of our own problems to solve right here in the good old USA (like our immigration fiasco and money supply gone wild) and I think it’s time to focus on that as opposed to bailing out the rest of the world from assholes who are in charge. Our policy of spreading global democracy is just not working, what’s more people tend to forget we live in a Republic not a Democracy. So why the hell are we trying to spread Democracy if that’s the case---I’m confused. If you recall history, when Benjamin Franklin was asked by the people what form of government we had he said, “A Republic if you can keep it.”

The question is can we keep it? It’s a scary question with the losers we’ve elected to public office in the house, senate, and executive branch (from both parties). The “Great Society” agenda has been crammed down our throats since FDR, but never as aggressive as it has in the past two years. We need to fire all the bums and get back to our roots. The constitution is a timeless document written by some pretty smart guys, let that be our guide back to freedom and the Republic our founders gave us.

If you’re still not sure that Freedom is the answer let’s make some comparisons. The East has the Trololo Guy and the Flanker, and the West has the AC/DC and the Raptor. Is there really a question? I’m not even going to throw in the babe comparison, that would really muddy the waters. I’m just saying, Russian women are pretty hot!

Communism:

TROLOLO GUY

FLANKER

Freedom:

AC/DC

RAPTOR

QUESTIONS?

Orgasmic Rainbow

Mon, 16 Aug 2010 03:30:00-0500

Have your ever had an orgasm over a double rainbow? WTFO! I guess if a fighter pilot were making this video and substituted Double D's for the Double Rainbow, you might just get the same reaction. "Wow,that's a full D all the way, OMG it's a double D, Wow, Wow, OMG, OMG, OMG, Wooohhh, Yeaaaa!" I know I'd be done at that point. What does this mean?

What The Captain Means

Mon, 19 Jul 2010 05:41:00-0500

F-BOMB ALERT

Have you read the hatchet job on Gen. Stanley McChrystal done in Rolling Stone? He would have been well advised to have a handler who could have stepped in and said, “What the General meant to say was the War in Afghanistan is being prosecuted as planned and going very smoothly.” This audio from Cam Rhan Bay in 1966, What the Captain means to say, is timeless. Why in the world would a smart and disciplined Army General allow himself to get backed into such a freak show?

I’m sure we can all relate to what he had to say in the interview, and I doubt most of us disagree with how he expressed his frustration toward our "political management" in Washington. We need more senior military leaders like McChrystal, Fogleman, and Macarthur who are willing to fall on their sword and call our clueless politicians out when necessary. Enjoy your retirement General, and thanks for your service. Thanks especially for not sugar coating the facts.

Old School Cope Thunder

Wed, 30 Jun 2010 05:13:00-0500

Some of us are old enough to remember when Cope Thunder in the Philippines was the greatest exercise on the planet for conducting large force employment in a virtually unrestricted environment. The only thing we couldn’t do was buzz Clark or Subic on RTB---Strike That--we had a dedicated airfield attack day where we did just that. OK, the only thing you couldn’t do was buzz the USS Midway at 250 feet while they were recovering aircraft--Strike That--we did that too. OK, it was pretty much an unrestricted flying environment.

The new toys we have may be really cool and all, but there was something about launching as a 16 ship, walling up at 40,000 feet in the cons, pushing south from the tooth towards crow valley, and then sending Cock 4 over to guard for our adversaries to hear “Gentlemen, The Claw.” Call me strange, but it made us all feel like fighter pilots and sport about 40% wood in the cockpit (that was a safety call, anymore would interfere with operating the jet).

I’m talking about fur balls with 16-20 airplanes in them that you could see for 20 miles (OK---it was officially only 8, anymore would be illegal). Didn’t matter if it was OCA week or DCA week, it was all good. On DCA week, we’d be the clowns protecting crow valley with a bunch of bent up, beat up F-5s to help us---maybe even a few A-4Ms from VC-5 to give us a red force of about 24-30 aircraft. The fighting was beyond great, and there was lots of it. There was much rejoicing when it was announced, “Tally-Ho Viper Train bulls eye 360 for 60.” We made an exception and went to 50% wood on that call even though safety may be compromised.

Then there was the RTB. Bubba would always make a point get our 16 ship rejoined for the pass in review over Clark. Imagine trying to orchestrate that with 40 other jets trying to vie for the same piece of concrete over about a 10 minute window. Clark would land a jet about every 10-15 seconds during that massive RTB. No RAPCON, No Whining, No Unable that, No Standby, No Bullshit. All you ever heard was “cleared and report base.” It was a thing of beauty.

I remember seeing about 12 airplanes on inside downwind with us over the numbers and another flight of Vipers right behind us. Landing on opposite sides was kind of a big deal on a day like that; in fact a Viper passed me on rollout about midfield. Nothing to get your panties in a wad about, just the kind of shit to expect at Clark during Cope Thunder. I found this video of a CT back in 1985 for your viewing pleasure. And yes, I know I’m just an irrelevant fossil stuck in the fighter pilot dreamland of the 80s. I kind of like it that way.

Arizona is Kickass

Fri, 18 Jun 2010 03:17:00-0500

I was stationed in Arizona twice in my Air Force career and My wife and I plan on having a place there for winters in the next few years. We just recently got back from there looking at property even though we won’t be able to use it for 6-7 years. Why, you might ask, do I want to buy now?!!

Well, I’m about to tell you. I have started my own anti-boycott of Arizona. I plan on buying everything I can from a state that actually has the balls to force our feds to do their job and in the absence of that will do it themselves. I don’t know what part of illegal in “illegal alien” that the bleeding hearts of this country don’t get but the folks in Arizona are tired of the doubletalk and politics so they’ve decided to take action as a state and demand results on their own.

By the way, the law in Arizona as it now stands is less strict than the one on the federal books. Don’t take my word for it… read it for yourself on line. The hypocrisy of coddling for votes while a great state is in jeopardy of violence and infiltration is an affront to all of America. My hat is off to the great state of Arizona and I encourage all of you to head that way for a vacation. Buy a lot of stuff while you’re there as well. Some of the greatest fighter pilot hang outs I know are located in Tucson, The Saddle Horn, Thirsty’s and The Cow Pony just to name a few. When I’m in town, that’s where I’m sitting; having a Jack with great Arizonans who get what law should be about.

Operation Bolo

Wed, 26 May 2010 06:43:00-0500

“The MiGs came up, the MiGs were aggressive, we tangled, they lost”

Col Robin Olds, 3 January 1967

Operation Bolo was a brilliantly planned and executed MiG sweep led by one of the greatest fighter pilots in history, Robin Olds. The key to its success was deception. The Wolf Pack Phantoms went north that day using F-105 call signs to lure enemy MIGs up to play. When the MiGs arrived at the Merge that day, they were in for a rude awakening when they found Phantoms with a justice load out of sparrows and sidewinders. They expected to see Thuds loaded with bombs, but instead found themselves quickly turning into flaming metal, hair, teeth, and eyeballs. After all, MIGs were born to die!

Between Olds, Ford, and Rambler flights, seven MiG-21s met their doom that day. Not a bad days work for Robin and his boys. I'm guessing there may have been some singing and drinking that night at the bar. I'm just saying....

This video clip from History Channels Dogfights gives a great recap of the engagement. Robin Olds was one of a kind, and the Air Force could use a lot more of him. Fortunately his fighting spirit lives on in the thousands of fighter pilots still flying today. He continues to teach us all what it means to be a fighter pilot.

Operation Bolo Tally Board:

Squadron	Call Sign	Aircraft Commander	Pilot	Missile
555 TFS	Olds 02	1st Lt. Ralph F. Wetterhahn	1st Lt. Jerry K. Sharp	AIM-7
555 TFS	Olds 04	Capt. Walter S. Radeker III	1st Lt. James E. Murray III	AIM-9
555 TFS	Olds 01	Col. Robin Olds	1st Lt. Charles C. Clifton	AIM-9
555 TFS	Ford 02	Capt. Everett T. Raspberry, Jr.	1st Lt. Robert W. Western	AIM-9
433 TFS	Rambler 04	Maj. Philip P. Combies	1st Lt. Lee R. Dutton	AIM-7
433 TFS	Rambler 01	Capt. John B. Stone	1st Lt. Clifton P. Dunnegan, Jr.	AIM-7
433 TFS	Rambler 02	1st Lt. Lawrence J. Glynn, Jr.	1st Lt. Lawrence E. Cary	AIM-7

F-35 DAS -- BFM This!

Tue, 23 Mar 2010 06:05:00-0500

I had an old bro of mine send me this video about the Electro Optical Distributed Aperture System, or DAS, on the F-35. It gives the F-35 a 360 degree 3-D view around the aircraft. It will allow the F-35 to detect/kill airborne and ground based threats with a 360 degree weapon engagement zone. The pilot will even be able to see what’s below the jet from a visual display on the visor.

In other words, you can look between your legs and detect threats without having to roll your jet. Throw data link into the picture and you can ID the good guys from the bad guys plus share information to help increase your SA. Pretty impressive stuff. Cap it off with a capability to throw an over shoulder Slammer at some unsuspecting MIG driver and now you can make a smart ass call on guard to “BFM this bitch” while you RTB to the bar.

I gotta tell you, I don’t like this shit, but I’m damn glad we have it. It takes almost all the fun out of flying fighters though. We can teach any X-Box 360 geek to fly a fighter or UAV now. No more turning, no more gunning, no more dying, and no more of the piss and vinegar of our founding father fighter pilots. The only good news is our enemies will die relaxed because they will have no idea what just hit them or where it came from. I must admit, that does kick ass.

I always thought launching and leaving was skirt raising. I grew up in the days of seeing fur balls from 20 miles away, putting it 10 to 2 o-clock, and then look for spitters to spank as they tried to bug out of the fight. As one of our readers has pointed out, I’m obviously “stuck in the fighter pilot dreamland of the 1980s and have become an irrelevant fossil.” Can’t really argue too much with that statement, I just miss the old days of slapping on a 9 G break turn and reversing on the commie bastard at my six and then blowing his (or her) shit away with the gun. Now instead of calling “break left bandit six o-clock” all you have to do is pickle and call “Fox 3 kill bug out present heading.” Now, doesn’t that just give you a giant woody? WTFO---YGBSM!!!

Can a Fighter Pilot's Ego Be Too Big?

Mon, 08 Mar 2010 06:00:00-0500

No, it can't.

OK, amazingly, on occasion, it doesn't happen often, but rarely a fighter pilot's ego can get a little out of hand. When it happens it's more than likely the result of accessories. Fighter pilots themselves are certainly justified in their confidence and pride, seen by some as arrogance. However, when they start wearing look-at-me-I-kickass accessories it's probably going too far.

Here's a perfect, no-kidding, real world example. Imagine an F-16 fighter pilot that's risen through the ranks and is now a two-star general, a Major General. He's assigned to the International Security Assistance Force, ISAF, in Kabul, Afghanistan. He's there with high ranking officers from the multi-national force including US Marine Corps and US Navy (some of them fighter pilots), US Army and special forces folks. So, what do you do when your two stars aren't impressive enough. Yeah, you're a general but you're not sure people know you're a fighter pilot. People might not know that you're a serious warrior. How can you be sure that you're getting the right amount of respect? Ah, yes, a nickel plated, pearl handled .45. That'll do it. Not just a regular pearl handle either, engraved with stars. These guys are going to look at you and say, "That guy kicksass!!"

Interestingly, upon arrival in Kabul, this fighter pilot was just a brigadier general, a one star, and his pearl handle reflected that appropriately with a single engraved star. Pinning on a second star during this tour, he had the wood grips installed on his gun temporarily while the new Major General waited for the arrival of his mail ordered, new pearl grips engraved with two stars. That must have been a trying time, carrying around that nickel plated gun with regular grips.

Now, let me get this straight. Eisenhower didn't carry a gun. Bradley didn't carry a gun. Hap didn't carry a gun. Even Monty didn't carry a gun. Yeah, Patton did but he was a diva and commanded a combat force of fifty thousand men. Of course, they weren't fighter pilots either. The only time guys like Robin Olds or Duke Cunningham carried a gun was in the jet, there for a possible survival situation. Even then, their guns weren't nickel plated and pearl handled.

OK, you want to John Wayne it and carry a gun but, come on, a nickel-plated-pearl-handle-look-at-me .45. Really? You think you're impressing those Marine or Army guys? Or what about those special forces guys? Sometimes a fighter pilot ego can get to be too big. How do you know when that happens? When you look like a dork. That's when it happens.

If you've got a big ego, then you belong
in the FU STORE. All kinds of stuff there
to keep your ego completely inflated.
Three nice designs below available
in the FU STORE that subtley say,
"FIGHTER PILOTS KICKASS!!"

Fox News Hotties

Mon, 22 Feb 2010 06:09:00-0500

It all started for most of us with Laurie Walker Dhue. When Fox was relatively new and I was in the desert for OEF, we finally got AFN and for a glorious portion of each day, if we weren’t flying, Laurie told us the news. Fox has hired and retained so many additional hotties since then that they are almost too numerous to number. The outstanding thing about their choices has not only to do with their looks; they are, in almost all cases, extremely intelligent to boot. Let’s go down the list shall we.

In no particular order:

Alisyn Camerota serves as a co-host of "FOX & Friends First" and news anchor for "FOX & Friends."

Gretchen Carlson joined FOX News Channel (FNC) in June 2005 and is the co-anchor of "FOX & Friends," the No. 1 cable morning program. She also regularly contributes to "The O'Reilly Factor."

Megyn Kelly currently anchors "America Live," (1-3 p.m. ET), a daytime news program on Fox News Channel (FNC), which launched in February of 2010. She previously co-anchored "America's Newsroom" with Bill Hemmer (9-11 a.m. ET) and appears weekly on "The O'Reilly Factor" in a segment entitled The Kelly File. NOTE: I see a trend here O’Reilly… nice work!!

Julie Banderas serves as the host of "The Big Story Weekend" for FOX News Channel (FNC), providing in-depth coverage and analysis of the day's biggest stories. She joined FNC in March 2005 as a general assignment reporter.

Jamie Colby joined FOX News Channel (FNC) in July 2003 and currently serves as a news correspondent and anchor. She anchored coverage of the passing of Pope John Paul II and the election of Pope Benedict XVI from Rome.

Shannon Bream is a Supreme Court reporter for FOX News Channel (FNC). She joined FNC in fall 2007 and is based in the network's Washington, D.C. bureau. Most recently, she provided coverage of the Supreme Court hearing on Guantanamo Bay detainees.

Martha MacCallum joined FOX News Channel (FNC) in January 2004. She is currently the new co-anchor of "America's Newsroom" with Bill Hemmer (9 AM EST). MacCallum previously co-hosted "The Live Desk," a Monday through Friday afternoon news program 1:00-3:00 (PM/ET)

Kimberly Guilfoyle works with Geraldo on his feature show “Geraldo at Large”… No offense Geraldo but she carries it with our viewers.

Jane Skinner joined FOX News Channel in 1998 as a general assignment reporter. Currently, Skinner is the co-anchor of "Happening Now."

Harris Faulkner is currently a breaking news anchor for FOX News Channel (FNC), appearing on both "Happening Now," from 10 a.m. to 1 p.m. ET and "The Live Desk" from 1 p.m. to 3 p.m. ET. Faulkner joined FNC in 2005 as a correspondent and prime-time news break anchor.

Sarah Palin… Fox News contributor, political hottie, conservative spokesperson, etc, etc, etc…. thank you.

I’m missing several of my favorites but I think we all get the point. America goes to Fox for “Fair and Balanced” news but they don’t stay there for hours looking at O’Reilly. I try to never miss his show if I can help it but it ain’t the face I’m watching. One hour is enough and then we need to move on to those featured above. Smart reporting and model quality, a fighter pilots dream news station. I’ve noticed there are no fighter pilot Fox contributors. Probably another good move by Fox. The bleeps would only last one show and the fines would finish them off. Thanks Fox; keep ‘em coming.

World's Best Nationality?

Mon, 01 Feb 2010 06:06:00-0500

Most nationalities around the world probably consider themselves the best of all. That's just human nature. Americans certainly do. Brits, Aussies, French, Brazilians, Chileans, Egyptians, Mozambiquens, Chinese, Japanese, Indians, all feel the same way. Most nationalities are proud of themselves and would want to at least be considered for world's best. For my money though, I have to cast my vote in favor of the Irish and my reasoning is quite simple, Irish pride and Irish pubs.

To get yourself in the door as world's top nationality you have to first think you indeed are the best. Some folks think it's too bourgeois, egotistical or arrogant to think you're the best; we've got a lot of those here in the US. The Irish don't have that problem at all. They are a very proud people. OK, pride square filled. Most importantly though, for my choice as the best nationality in the world, is their invention of the Irish pub.

I read once that the greatest invention in the history of man is the clock. That may be true but the Irish pub is a very close second. Pub is an acronym for Perfectly Unbelievable Bar (I made that up) and when you put Irish in front of that acronym it becomes a kickass bar. What makes Irish pubs even better is that they are everywhere. I just made a trip to Paris and rather than going to museums, towers and cathedrals, which I've already done, I did an Irish pub crawl. No matter where you go you'll be able to find an Irish pub. London, Dallas, Moscow, Bangkok, Tegucigalpa, Jabuti, even Mogadishu. I'd put money on the fact that there's an Irish pub somewhere along the coast of Lake Titicaca. (Maybe not but I just like to say Lake Titicaca.)

Whatever or wherever you visit an Irish pub you're going to meet locals, folks from throughout that country and maybe even others from around the world. People in Irish pubs are always friendly and willing to talk. Irish pubs are an interactive, real world social setting that promotes political, racial and class harmony and tolerance. If you're a stranger in town and you're looking for a comfortable place for a few pints and some agreeable conversation, do a search on Google, Yahoo or Bing for Irish pub and you will be pleasantly rewarded.

The Irish have given the world a place where people from all walks of life can come together. Irish pubs have infiltrated countries around the globe and made each one of them a better place and a more tolerant society. Irish pubs are the reason the greatest nationality on earth are the folks from the Emerald Isle.

When you go to an Irish pub, here's what you want to wear.
It's available in the FU Store.

Fighter Pilot Help for Tiger's Sexual Addiction

Mon, 25 Jan 2010 06:00:00-0500

Tiger Woods has a sexual addiction. That's not terribly surprising. This sexual addiction is the result of what I call The Bill Clinton Syndrome.* Here's how it works. You spend your entire adolescent life as a dweeb or nerd of some type. Grow up to have an astronomical rise to fame, fortune or power. Unprepared for the sudden lust of women, sexual addition is the result.

Bill Clinton was a band nerd. Other than maybe some action at band camp those types of guys just didn't attract much female attention. Bill Clinton gets into politics. Whether you like his positions on issues or not, he's good at it. Works his way up and becomes the governor of Arkansas. That's when things change. Chicks dig guys in power. Governor Clinton is not use to this female attention. When he becomes President he has more power and even greater female attention. For a band nerd, that kind of female attention is overwhelming and sexual addiction is inevitable. Nerd to political chick magnet = sexual addition.

In Tiger's case, he grew up concentrating almost exclusively on golf with his dad always by his side. Not much of a chick magnet recipe. After winning a few national amateur championships, he jumps to the pros and immediately gets a 30 million dollar Nike contract and starts kicking everyone's ass, becoming the greatest golfer in the world. One thing chicks dig even more than power is money. Tiger's raking in a hundred million a year. That kind of cash attracts chicks by the thousands wherever he goes. Golf nerd to billionaire = sexual addiction.

Now, you're almost certainly thinking, "Don't fighter pilots experience the same thing?" Well, yes, they experience the chick magnetism but, no, they are prepared for the overwhelming attention. Most fighter pilots have been quite socially active growing up. They've been athletes, class presidents, class clowns, guys chosen to pick teams, natural born leaders. They've always had some female attention to varying degrees. This gradual escalation of heightened female attraction allows them to avert the possibility of sexual addiction. Sure there are fighter pilots that succumb to their powers of female desirability but most of those are the guys who aren't really in the fighter pilot business because they want to be the best fighter pilot in the world. No, most of these types of fighter pilots are the guys that become generals.

OK, back to Tiger's sexual addiction. He's getting treatment to try and overcome it. Here's an easy solution. Tiger, give away all your money. Give away the houses, the yacht, everything. No money, no chick attention, no sexual addiction. Rid yourself or this treaded addiction. Man, you really have got to feel some pain for the guy. Addiction is a powerful drive that usually can only be remedied with professional help. Well, I'm a professional and I'm here to help. By the way Tiger. If you like this idea, I'll be happy to e-mail my bank account information to help you get started on your road to recovery.

*The Bill Clinton Syndrome to be addressed in greater detail in my article in an upcoming addition of American Psychology Journal.

Now you might be someone with a sexual addiction, and you like it that way, or maybe you’re just a sexual hobbyist. In either case, we can help. FU gear from the FU Store will increase whatever female magnetism you already have. Fighter pilot or not, stuff from the FU Store will turn you into a chick magnet. Turn it up! Get to the FU Store today.

Fighter Squadron IG Inspections

Mon, 11 Jan 2010 06:04:00-0500

Every military service, in every country of the world has some sort of evaluation team that determines just how ready fighter squadrons are to go into combat. For a lot of services that evaluation team is called the Inspector General. Inspector General (IG) teams have been around for hundreds of years. They serve a valuable purpose but sometimes they lose sight of their reason for existing.

Often times these readiness inspections become an end in themselves. The inspection scenarios can become unrealistic. The inspectors can become pompous and self-serving. Millions of dollars are spent and thousands of man-hours are worked to prepare for an inspection that has very little to do with the way that a squadron will actually fight and does almost nothing to improve combat capability. It becomes nothing more than feeding the IG machine.

Folks have complained about these readiness inspections for decades. Better and more flexible evaluation procedures could certainly be developed. Here's one idea that's been suggested repeatedly, especially since 9/11. Almost every fighter squadron in the US military deploys to the Middle East at one time or another. How about sending an IG team to watch a squadron generate their jets and launch for the real deployment? Novel concept. Actually watch it real world. Once in place, send an IG team there to watch real, daily operations for 3-4 days. Then go home and write your report. Evaluation complete, attaboys acknowledged, shortfalls noted with recommendations.

One of the reasons that doesn't happen is because IG teams don't want to be a second fiddle. They want to be the big dog on base when they arrive. They don't want to be asked to quietly remain on the sideline while real world activities go on around them and just observe. They certainly don't want to spend a week in a tent, shelter or hut in 120° temperatures, share a community toilet and stand in a chow hall line. They want their hotel bed, steak dinner and a couple beers at Applebee's and their very presence to cause trepidation among the underlings. Feed the IG machine.

IG folks will say to do real world contingency evaluations would drastically increase their budget and that they don't have enough people to operate that way. Their budget and manning could easily be increased with the millions of dollars in savings from squadrons no longer having to waste hours and money prepping to pass the IG game.

Here's a couple examples of the absurdity of some of these operational readiness inspections, one a squadron about to deploy, another after returning. The first, a fighter squadron that has been given short notice orders, leaving in two months, for a six month deployment. A week after the deployment orders the already planned IG visit occurs and it doesn't go well. Lots of problems with maintenance. OK, now they're down to six weeks before the deployment. The IG tells them they'll be back before the deployment for a re-evaluation. Great, six weeks to prepare for another inspection. During that same time the squadron is also supposed to upgrade their pilots in the use of targeting pods, fly realistic get-ready-for-combat sorties and hopefully get some family time before departing. Feed the IG machine.

The second situation concerns a squadron that had been deployed for ten months. During that time their maintenance folks, in 130° temperatures, blinding sand storms and occasional mortar attacks, delivered jets to support all taskings in excess of a 99% rate. Upon return home focus immediately turned to the impending IG inspection. Ten months of preparation, numerous practice evaluations, get the IG rules down just right and millions of dollars spent. Almost the same results as the first squadron. You maintenance guys just aren't doing it quite right. We'll be back when you've got it straightened out. More time, more money, feed the IG machine.

In both cases the IG could have watched real aircraft generations, real deployments and real operations. Yeah, the IG machine isn't built that way but it should be. IG teams aren't there so that fighter squadrons can prove their capabilities to them, they're there to make fighter squadrons better and make fighter pilot's lives easier.

You do that by putting out reports that show to the fighter world what kickass stuff some squadrons are doing and what mistakes others are making. You do that by eliminating the workload and money of long, drawn out spin ups by making all inspections, readiness and paperwork, no notice. Expect to see errors and mistakes but expect to see kickass stuff too. Help fix the bad stuff, stack praise on the good stuff. Sure, if your military service isn't on a regular, real-world deployment schedule, you've got to make up some kind of scenario to allow evaluation but make it realistic. (Let's see, maybe we don't have to put so much emphasis on the chem gear every time.)

I've been a part of numerous wartime readiness inspections, as a participant and, even more, as an IG evaluator. The manpower and money utilized to put on a good show is a waste. IG expectations to see squeaky clean, all T's crossed and all I's dotted, every radio call concise and expeditious, do it our way or the sortie doesn't count, is unrealistic. It's come to the point where these inspections get in the way of improving a squadron's combat capability. It's time to overhaul the entire IG machine to save time and money and let fighter squadrons get on with the uncluttered business of preparing for combat.

GO INSPECT THE FU STORE NOW!
WE'RE ALWAYS READY.

A Fighter Pilot View on Global Warming

Mon, 28 Dec 2009 05:52:00-0500

Our college of meteorology has not taken any sides on the global warming issue. That is attributed to the fact that we don’t know shit about it and we don’t really believe anyone else does either. Our cynical side tells us that there is truth at some level on many sides but when we see redistribution of income as a nation to other nations due to carbon output levels, we are probably too far to the left and when we see folks say nothing is happening and pay no attention to the man behind the curtain, we are too far to the right (where I tend to live, admittedly). Due to this conundrum, we want to say that we are ignorant to this issue and are too lazy to find the facts that would present you with our ever relevant opinions. This would require less beer time and more study and as all of you know; the most important learning begins and ends at the bar. We are not unsympathetic to the needs of those that feel they are directly affected by perceived global warming and we want to draw your attention to the picture below as they are pissed at what they feel will change their lives permanently. Pray for them and think of the children.

Predator FWIC -- WTFO

Mon, 21 Dec 2009 09:00:00-0500

Predator Weapons School, You gotta be shittin me? I guess it’s just called the “The School” now since the title “Fighter Weapons School” implies that anyone other than a fighter pilot is not worthy of the “patch.” The AF is using a female A-10 driver as it’s poster child for the new Predator Weapons School. Check out the story at http://www.af.mil/news/story.asp?id=123182852.

Not to be PC here at FU, but I need to point out that we mean no disrespect toward this particular female A-10 driver and would like to pass on our thanks for her service to our nation. The article pointed out that she was five months pregnant when she found out she was going to “The School” and would have to leave her 1 year old daughter and new born son in order to attend “The School” the following summer. I really don’t care to comment on that statement, it kind of speaks for itself. But, I say again, YGBSM right?

The article also points out that “The school”, initially created for fighter pilots, now integrates Airmen from 22 different aircraft and specialties. The addition of Unmanned Aircraft (no pun intended) is an indication of their value in current conflicts and the need for their inclusion in the broader Air Force mission.

I got this article from Grinder, a retired Viper Driver who calls the FU Frat House home. In the e-mail from him he said:

YGBSM!!!!! The world as I knew it is gone forever! WTFO! "I got the notification that I was selected for Weapons School when I was five months pregnant??????????" Has the world lost it's mind? God, it's good to be retired. Who's idea was it anyway to drop the "Fighter" designation from FWIC anyway??? OBTW, Merry Christmas.

Don’t know who’s idea it was to drop the “Fighter” word from FWIC, but maybe someone in our student body could fill us in. I’m with Grinder, it’s good to be retired old codgers. Grinder and I got spoiled during the 80s. We had Ronnie Reagan, money, great jets, amazing flying, and we were encouraged to act like the warriors we were.